I'm leavin on a jet plane!

I leave in the morning. Wow. I woke up this morning, knowing that the next time I wake up, I'll be squooshed between Jenni and Robin with intentions of hopping on a plane to Africa for nearly half a year. What in the world? How did this happen - is what I keep asking myself. I just laid in bed for a while enjoying the full size of my bed; (we're in twins in Africa) I enjoyed the sound of my fan and the peace I felt. There is no doubt at all in my mind that I'm not supposed to go. I feel all the assurance in the world. God has swept us off our feet with trusting Him. Support raising has been so cool to watch our faith based income appear, seemingly out of no where! The first week of support raising, after I'd sent out my letters, I was so discouraged and I had no choice but to put my fears on the alter and trust God to provide. "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well" (Matthew 6:33). "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also" (Matthew 6:21). I didn't want my 'treasure,' my heart to be set on a financial goal. I didn't want this journey to pass me by, just expecting money. I wanted my treasure to be in Christ, so my heart would beat for Him, not for my " tangible needs." Does that make sense? It probably doesn't. I wanted my heart to draw from the well of my Provider, seeking Him first, knowing all things come from Him. I knew that in doing so, "all these things would be given to me," and He would get the glory. "For where your treasure is, there your heart is also..." Where do you think your treasure is?

I have a list of things I should be doing right now, but our internet is cut off in a few hours and I really wanted to blog some thoughts since I haven't had time to in weeks. Life has been so busy and I've tried to keep up, but this past weekend it caught up with me and I hit a brick wall. Ever since Friday, I've felt really weak. This happened in December too with all those Christmas gatherings. I've just had to rest. I'm feeling better today. Please pray for my energy b/c Holly and I start in Capetown Thursday and I really want to keep up and explore with her and our new friend and guide, Guillame. Guillame is from Capetown and is in Brad's small group. He'll be taking us around Capetown this weekend! We're so excited.

Some friends are coming over tonight to pray over Holly and I. I haven't really cried except once - at our fundraising party when Jenni Brussat hugged me. Then C-Mac was behind her and Waites too. All 3 of them together made me weep at the thought of leaving them and many others. It was a hard cry! My fake lashes fell off and I got mascara all over Waites' new shirt. Sorry buddy! Hope that came out. I don't like to cry in front of people and I always try to be the "strong one," but I'll bet some tears will escape tonight. I'm the type that keeps the wall up until after the fact, then they crumble down and so do I. It will be like ripping my flesh from my bones to leave you all here for a time. This adventure is bittersweet. I am more than honored that God would call me to partake in whatever He has going on in Africa. I am still in awe that He'd choose me. I feel incredibly inadequate and small to the calling, but this has nothing to do with me, but Christ in me, who empowers and equips. I AM small and that is the point. The only "big" thing in me is Jesus. We are His ambassadors, as if God were making His appeal through us (2 Cor 5:20). Keep on appealing for Him in Atlanta and Birmingham, and Nashville - wherever you are that you're reading this. You are all missionaries in a foreign land wherever you are! Everyone needs Jesus, whether they think they do or not. You DO. Pride will tell you that you don't. I could talk all day. Sorry I haven't written in a while. I must go get my last shot and then pack up some more. You are loved!

ABOUT MY CELL PHONE - It will be cut off March 8 - June 8. TMO could only freeze it for 3 months. On June 9, I have the smallest plan with international access. I just wanted you to know I'm not losing my #, although it will say it's been disconnected, probably. Just email me! I'd love to keep in touch.

Beth